a new path

i have been out of school for sometime. Our goal was that when i finished my degree, Luke would have a turn. Well, I have yet to finish but with the lack of job offers pouring in Luke has started thinking about going to culinary school. We have thought about this many times before and always hit a road block when it came to finances. At this point, we have nothing to lose so we are pursuing it further than we ever have. He has chosen a program and applied for it. We are waiting on transcripts to come in from his HS. He has started filing out his FAFSA also. We still have many daunting questions- but we are doing our best to keep all doors open at this point. It's so scary- especially with soon to be 3 children. But if it's God's will, he'll make it happen. And if not, he'll point us toward another door!

a true blessing

The ultrasound went wonderful! We saw our little baby who is currently about 9 weeks. The heartbeat measured 181bpm and everything is looking wonderful for the future of this pregnancy! The new due date is Oct 21, 2009! Which is 4 days after Cecilia turns one. But since I will have another Csection, these kiddos will probably have the same birthday week!
We are so thankful and give God all the praise in this situation!




Thank you for all your prayers and sweet notes of encouragement!

from shocked to scared.

Wednesday, March 11Th we had a our first ultrasound. We began by finding what we think to be a heartbeat, but no baby could be seen. She tried "the other" ultrasound and had no luck finding our little one that way either. At this point, my uterus is measuring slightly smaller than it did last week (9w2d should be 10w3d) and we are finding no heartbeat. We are told to have blood work done and come back next week for another ultrasound. The blood work should reveal if I am having a miscarriage that has only begun or if this baby is way younger than we thought. My uterus could still be enlarged from my pregnancy with Cecilia.
This whole process has been a huge emotional roller coaster. Finding yourself pregnant before your daughter turns 4 months old is shocking, scary and a little embarrassing. Finding out that you took for granted the miracle of birth, is heartbreaking. Had you asked me Tuesday if I was excited to be having this child, I would have told you no. This past weekend, I was pretty honest with family and friends about the situation. Even saying at one point I didn't want to be pregnant at all.
I feel terrible about those statements, but even more, I feel terrible for not giving God thanks even in this stressful time. I have a terrible regret that I didn't consider this a precious gift from God. He calls us to be thankful in ALL things. And so, turning over a new leaf, and trying my hardest to put God and His will before my own, I pray that the Lord's will be done in our situation. I pray that Luke and I will learn the simple lesson that every good and perfect gift truly is from the Lord and not our own doing. And I pray that the blessing of a child, pregnancy will remain in our minds as a true miracle from God.
We won't know until today the results of the blood test. When I asked the nurse if it was possible that I could continue to carry this child, she responded with "miracles happen every day". Luke and I have spent the last 14 hours begging God for a miracle. We are expecting the worst and hoping for the best.

Please forgive us if we are slow to return phone calls the next couple days. There is so much on our plates and instead of pushing through it we truly desire to learn from it. We love you all and appreciate your prayers! Love, Luke, Leah, Landen and Cecilia.

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Today at noon, the nurse called me with my lab results. Praise GOD! As of now my progesterone is 20! Which she said is "beautiful"! She said my hcg is nice and high. I have another sonogram scheduled for Monday at 1pm. Please join us in thanking God and continued prayer for a healthy baby.